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Author Topic: Our Pearl Wedding  (Read 1984 times)
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L A
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« on: October 09, 2015, 10:48:18 PM »

Wrote this as a surprise   undecided  for my husband for our 30th Wedding Anniversary earlier this year!
I enjoy writing stuff as, although knackering and too stimulating for my addled, buzzing M.E. brain, (I really must learn to pace!!), it's an effective distraction from this #**%##* plague that wont get the message that it's more than outstayed its welcome!! Not that it ever was welcome. More of a squatter really.
 Anyway, I hope it makes you smile.  smile
                   

Our Pearl Wedding.

Skidding and sliding, NO BRAKES! towards sixty,   
So distant the day I turned fifty!                                     
“No matter! It’s only a number!” I thought,                     
“Cos I’m still so alluring and nifty!”                             

No one would guess three score years had gone by,
I was perky, not long in the tooth!
Yet one glance at my wizened, slack skin on display,
Oh! How gravity’s work told the truth:

Haggard, old, bloodshot eyes squinted at me;
Etched face; drooping jowls; shrivelled mouth;
Flabby old limbs; long pendulous boobs
On their sad, one way trip heading south.

Primordial screams burst forth from my soul;
Had to act fast to stop the rot spreading!
Got to banish this crone who was stealing my youth,
And in time for our April Pearl Wedding!

So! Frantic emergency treatments were booked
At a spa that does large-scale repairs:
I was rubbed down and oiled; pummelled and buffed;
Full-strength wax wrenching out stubbly hairs.

The beautician still wearing a pitying look said:
“No doubt in the dark you’ll look fine!
But I do think you need all the help you can get;
Why not look at Ann Summers on-line?”

Well! Diaphanous undies festooned every page,
Saucy peek-a-boos; tassels and splits!
Even lingerie designed with our comfort in mind:
Ventilated to cool those warm bits.

As the therapist’s words echoed round in my head, 
I bought items in silk, net and lace.
Drop kicking that loathsome old hag into touch;
Let the new raunchy me take her place!

So! Half-crazed with delight when the courier winked
And said, “Hi, Darlin’! Look what I’ve brought yer!”
But my fantasies died with his merciless words:
“Oh! I guess these are for yer granddaughter!”

By Dee Luded
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Emily_Pascoe1988
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« Reply #1 on: June 02, 2017, 09:50:43 PM »

wonderful poem, thanks for sharing with us Smiley
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JanBlackSmith
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WWW
« Reply #2 on: April 24, 2018, 06:42:39 AM »

Hi, Darlin’! Look what I’ve brought yer!
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