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Author Topic: lonely, bored etc etc...  (Read 45 times)
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GreenJuice
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« on: June 10, 2018, 06:10:09 PM »

Hello,

I'm not sure if anyone is going to read this but i just wanted somewhere to vent my frustrations.

I have been living with ME for 14 months.  I thought I had accepted it but I know realise that I have really been in denial.  I was doing really well a few weeks ago & then had another crash a week ago & still not recovered to pre-crash level.

I don't have much energy to type everything that I want to, but I just want to say that I am so fed up and I am so lonely. I am 35 and have had to move home and live with my parents.  I know I'm lucky to have had this option but it has been a real life change for me as I haven't lived with them in 15 odd years. I also had to move back to my home country where I haven't lived in 15 years.  I come across a lot of people online who have ME but also who have partners & children who support them. I just feel I am watching all of my friends settling down with people and moving forward with their lives while I am still living with my parents.  I feel I have lost touch with a lot of my friends and I am so jealous of their lives & their health.
I haven't been able to work since I have become ill and I just feel I don't know who I even am anymore.
I find it hard speaking to people because, whilst most of my friends & family are compassionate, no-one truly gets it.  My parents expect me to put a good face on all the time, and sometimes I just cannot do this.  They say things to me like- 'surely being bored is a good sign', which makes me so angry because it just shows that they do not know what I am going through.  Like most people with ME I have had to give up everything that once gave me pleasure.
On the odd times when I am able to go out, because I have not lived in this city for a long time, I do not have people even to meet up with.
I realise that I am lucky to be able to go out & I realise there are a lot of people who cannot even do this, but my life is still severely restricted.  I have read so many books, watched all the TV I want (and am able to watch) I am really struggling to find something to keep me going. I am so lonely, bored & frustrated.

Thanks
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roger
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After 12 years of trying, I'm now A OK


« Reply #1 on: June 10, 2018, 06:44:19 PM »

Hi GreenJuice, and welcome to the forum.

It sucks, doesn't it. And its absolutely understandable that you're lonely, bored and frustrated. Pretty much everyone who joins or visits this forum will understand how you're feeling because they've been there.

I've been part of this forum for around ten years and I've seen many people who were where you are at the moment and have now got their lives back. I think that's what you'd benefit from dwelling on rather than how you're feeling now. To my mind, that's the first step to wellness - knowing that it doesn't have to be forever.

I got lumbered at around age 58 and all the doctor's, including the natural ones, said that 'at my age' I should think in terms of management rather than recovery. Well they were wrong. You're around twenty-three younger than I was at the start of 'my journey'. If I can do it, so can you. Please think about that. You CAN recover. You CAN get your life back.

Best wishes.

Roger.
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